Why didn't I think of this?

Did you know your feet are conduits to the rest of your body? This compelling fact makes these detoxifying natural herbal foot patches truly indispensable. Worn for 8–10 hours while you sleep, they stimulate circulation and remove toxins such as nickel, arsenic and mercury, according to extensive research. Placed on the arch, they go straight to major reflexology organs to maximize the effects. Ten disposable pads per box. USA. And only $30 for a pack of 10 square stickers!! I want to get on the board of the company who makes these. They probably have sessions where they get together and brainstorm on the most ridiculous health product they could invent that people will actually buy. I swear they must have giggled quite a bit when this product became not only a "best seller", but also a "customer favorite" here. Please leave any suggestions for looney medical/health devices in the comment section. You have to use the words "natural, detoxifying, and herbal", or else "according to extensive research" to get full credit. I may select the winner as a business joint venture. I'll provide the MD stamp of authenticity. p.s. If you were considering "micro-massage anti-cellulite pants" as your entry, that idea was already taken ($150!)